After the Storms

Jubilee for a whole year is a harder than you might think.  Jubilee for a day a weekend or even a season would be manageable.  Five months into Jubilee bad things are bound to happen and they have.  My son and daughter-in-law lost their home in the tornadoes that ripped through the South at the end of April.  Everything in it smashed to smithereens and flung against the hill on the other side of the road.   After a quick trip down to Tennessee for hugs and tears it was back to work and one grueling deadline after another.  (A pox on bureaucratic regulators!) The apartment complex I have been living in is closing for renovation and forced us into an unscheduled move.  (Still mad about that!)  Most days I have felt that I could barely push one foot in front of the other let alone Jubilee.  St. Louis weather has obliged my dank dismal mood with one of the coolest, wettest May’s on record.  The Merry Month of May it was not! 

Someone asked me last week “what’s been the hardest part of your Jubilee,” and I thought to myself, “what Jubilee? This has been the month from Hell.” 

So at this point you’re probably wondering – is the Jubilee over?  In spite of all my grousing and bitter complaining I am forced to admit that I am so thankful, so very, very grateful!  The worse my son and his wife had to suffer was a loss of earthly possessions.  The generosity of friends, family and total strangers (as well as a good insurance policy) have made them whole again except for a few lost mementos.  And in the midst of a slow, slow economic recovery the aforementioned bureaucrats have insured my continued employment.  And as it turns out my sweet husband found us a new apartment with almost twice the square footage and a beautiful three tiered garden patio.

We have survived the storms.  So why am I complaining? 

A close friend of mine lost an adult son to a drug overdose after a long and painful struggle with mental illness and addiction.  In a conversation with him recently he reminisced about the too short relationship with a beautiful but conflicted child.  He remarked, “Life is bittersweet, but the sweet is so very sweet!”  Is it?  Is the sweet still sweet after unspeakable grief, disappointment and loss?  If the answer is yes it is the miracle of grace, amazing grace!

When I take a moment to set down my petty annoyances and frustrations my heart can’t help but sing with joy.  The sweet is so very sweet!